Accepting the Lessons Our Failures Bring

Yesterday I was in a situation that reminded me just how far I've come on this journey working on myself.

One of the biggest things that I needed to work on was how I talked to others. I was always a nice person but I didnt think of the things that I said. I let words fall out of my mouth. I could be offensive, actually sometimes I was purposely offensive to stave people off and hold a boundary that I didn't know how to hold for myself at that time.

After the incident yesterday, I was reminded just how hard I had worked the past 4 years. It took a fair bit of practicing to take a pause and go through the pendulum swings of pausing too long or not pausing enough to finally find a homeostasis that I am comfortable with. For the most part, now, I am very proud of how I handle things.

It also made me think a bit deeper about this incident. I could have shamed myself for not handling the situation the way that I had practiced for years. I could have gone down the path of negative self talk. But what good would have come from that?

We are all working on something whether it be working out, eating healthy, not yelling at our kids as much, or not talking negatively to ourselves. In the moment that we fail at these, we have a tendency to come down on ourselves and punish ourselves so that next time, we do better.

We need to stop coming from a place of negativity every time that we fail. If we make the shift from negative self talk to accepting the lesson and moving forward. Take the failure and realize what you still have to work on and grow from there. Instead of dwelling on the failure itself, create a plan for the next time you are in the situation again. What do you need? What will help you make the right choice for a better outcome?

This is one of the most important things that we can do for ourselves when we are trying to learn and grow. When we speak negatively to ourselves and hurt ourselves, we are only creating more trauma and wounds for us to work on and heal.

Allow yourself to be you while you are working on these things. Give yourself grace to move on and accept the lessons that your failures bring.

Be proud of who you are and how far you have come in this moment of your journey.